Me... now

Well, first things first. I'm now working at Starcom Worldwide, media
outfit of Leo Burnett. I was so much into proving my previous bosses
that their employees are not who they think they are - that they have
something to say, that the grass is greener beyond the outskirts of San
Juan - that the world has something much much better to offer than a
graphic design company that is beginning to disintegrate.

It was just a week of vacation and I was off to working again. I liked
it that way, but it seemed that a week of rest from my journey to the
underworld was not enough. But it was fine. Besides, if I wanted to
prove myself, I wanted to do it right away. But then things change.
People change.

I always thought I'd enjoy media. But this thinking led me to a shit
hole deeper than I ever wanted to be in. I've always loved numbers and
analyzing. But there's this part of me screaming out and telling me that
I belonged to some place else. What could that place be? I never
understood. But somehow my family and my close friends kept on reminding
me one way or another of one thing.

Being a Zombie is the last thing I thought of becoming - like all the
working people you see around, mindlessly going to work dressed up in
skirts and blazers and ties, people succumbing to their bosses like a
tribe of indigenous men bowing down to their deities, these are people
who allow themselves to be pushed around by their duties and by the time
they are running after or running from (either way). They are all
around, they may have colorful lives, they may not be zombies by their
own definitions, but they are to mine. They remind me of the stiffness
of life that I did not imagine I would be having since I was a little
kid and started dreaming. I am not a zombie to be dragged along by
strict rules. But somehow, I have to follow them. Everyone does.
Everything is in order.

Maybe that's why my life isn't.

(to be continued...)